I finally have a chance to sit down and type up my birth story. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I haven’t posted a single thing since Liesel was born. Brian has never showed much interest in posting until this little lady was born! It has been a full two weeks for us as a family; and for the first time I feel like I can really say that we’re a family! So here it is:
My due date was November 20th, but I never expected to go into labor on that day. It gave me something to count down to and despite my “knowing” that labor wouldn’t start, I hadn’t expected to be quite so anxious counting up until her arrival. I had regular Braxton-Hicks contractions about an hour to 30 minutes apart for three weeks before actually going into labor (I had them earlier also, but mostly while exercising or hiking). My sister Sarah said her labors usually followed a similar pattern and she knew it was really starting when she started feeling them in her back.
After a week I was really feeling antsy. My mom had arrived and I was feeling huge. Nine days later (Monday morning) I woke up at 6am and noticed that I was feeling a BH contraction in my back. Remembering what my sister said, I waited to see if another would follow. Another one came and then another. They were 20 minutes apart and then they stopped.
All three of us by this time were wondering when the baby was going to come.That afternoon we decided to take a hike up the Moab Rim trail (about 2:00pm). It’s about 2m round trip and pretty steep. It’s close to town and we figured it would be good to get a little exercise and let my mom see the view of the town from the top. We all walked at a slow pace and I was surprised by how good I felt at the top and hadn’t even had and BH’s the whole way up. We hiked back down to the car and then drove to Library.
As soon as we got to the library (3:30pm), I felt like I had to go to the bathroom. As I walked in I felt a really strong contraction that kind of buckled me over for a minute and made me catch my breath. I was amazed the intensity; it felt like my back was sore, my muscles cramping, I had to go to the bathroom and throw up all at the same time. Then as soon as the minute was up I felt completely fine. Remarkable. Mom thought labor was probably starting. With so many false starts and stops in the past, Brian and I were more skeptical.
I went in and sat down at the computers with Brian and mom and I noticed that I had two other contractions about 10 minutes apart while we were there. I no longer felt comfortable and wanted to leave. I told the others and we all walked out. When we got back to the car, I thought I needed to go to the bathroom again and this time I felt like I could barely walk when the contraction hit. Then it stopped and I felt fine again. We decided to stop by the grocery store and pick up a few things; a few of those being pudding, yogurt, juice and popsicles for me to eat during labor. I was concerned about not eating and running out of calories for the marathon ahead.
I initially thought I could walk around the store also, but as soon as I got the cart another one hit and I realized I had better just wait in the car. By now I knew this was real, but was still wondering if they would taper off at all. They weren’t. My mom very strongly hinted that we had better leave as soon as possible or the two hour drive to Grand Junction was going to be miserable and my baby might be born in Cisco on the side of the highway.
We drove home and I decided to lie down on the bed while they got things packed and organized. They were still coming at about 8-10 minutes apart and I was able to get through them pretty well by relaxing. I couldn’t believe how much pain I felt in my lower back. After about an hour we were all packed up and I was being loaded into the car feeling a little strange. The midwife/doctor had both told us not to drive up until the contractions were 5 minutes apart for 1 hr and I couldn’t talk through them. They were 6-10 minutes apart, but already requiring my concentration (and Brian’s) to get through.
The drive to Grand Junction was actually bearable and the quickest 2 hour drive I’ve ever experienced. I had pillows all around me and was trying to stay calm, focused and hydrated. During every contraction Brian gave me something to think about; sunsets at ISKY, the beach at Poipu in Hawaii, etc. and reminded me constantly to relax and breath slow and deep. He counted off the 15 second intervals through each contraction (which lasted at this point about 1-2 minutes) and came every 6-8minutes.
I remember stopping at the gas station at Crescent Junction and about dying because the parking lot was gravel and excruciating to endure the bumps while in the car. At this point I was balling up my fist and pushing my back as hard as I could against my knuckles to relieve some of the pain. I had about 4-6 minutes between contractions (since they lasted about 2 minutes) and lumbered into the gas station bathroom hoping I could get back and situated before the next one hit. On my way back to the car I arbitrarily wondered if the two men working had any idea I was in labor.
The rest of the drive went similarly; Brian timing and soothing me while I tried to make it through each one. I still felt like I could stay on top of it; I hadn’t yet been consumed. We arrived at the Marriot hotel at 7:30pm. The rest of the night was all about timing. Brian would wait in the car with me until after a contraction, then run into the hotel and register us, then come back out and wait through another one, then help me lumber to the hotel room. Then he’d help me through another, then run out and get our stuff and try and make it back before another one hit. This was the same routine when checking out of the hotel and then again arriving at the hospital. By this point they were 6 minutes apart and lasting for two—giving me about a 4 minute break most of the time.
Once we were in the hotel room things started to shift. They were feeling even more intense and nothing was working; the side-lying position made me feel horrible, standing didn’t help nor did kneeling. After about an hour we filled the hotel bathtub and I got in. I have no concept of time during all of this, except that it seemed to pass quickly. I would soak in the tub with two large towels draped over me and Brian would help me through each contraction. He offered me one spoonful of yogurt or pudding or a sip of juice between each one so I could keep up my energy.
After a while the contractions were getting even more insane. There were a couple where I literally could not relax or breath and the ball wasn't in my court. I kept having to go to the bathroom and while I soaked they increased to five minutes apart a few times. Finally I couldn’t bare the tub any longer—I was starting to lose control and the contractions were taking over. Everything is kind of blur at this point, but I remember a few hitting me so hard that I ran to the bathroom and projectile vomited several times all over the floor while having diarrhea and the most intense back and abdomen pain. I remember gripping the door handles, moaning and feeling horrible for Brian who was comforting me while cleaning up the bathroom floor. This happened a few other times at the hotel but it all runs together. I also remember shaking uncontrollably a few times in the hotel and hospital.
It was about 1:30 or 2 am at this point and we made a plan to leave at 3 am hoping that I would be dilated enough to be admitted to the hospital. That last hour was the hardest in the hotel. We arrived to the hospital at 3:30 and I was wheeled to the labor and delivery floor. I thought I was going to vomit on the elevator because the movement made me feel sick. The L&D floor seemed sleepy—the lights were dimmed and no one was around (not even nurses). It was actually calming.
A nurse brought me to a room and checked me—I was dilated to 5cm and the nurse said I was so ready you could almost slip the last part of the cervix around the baby’s head. We were both relieved. I had been bracing for 3cm. I had been in labor for over 12 hours at this point with strong enough contractions that I couldn’t talk through them. Our nurse put a monitor on me to measure my contractions and the baby’s heart rate for 20 minutes. She asked me if I would like to know my options for pain management. I said sure. She told me about my two options and then asked if I was interested. I told her I wasn’t at that point. That was the only time that pain medications were mentioned.
She left and Brian and I were on our own for the next several hours. I was surprised when I thought about it later that no one really came in and checked on us until I was ready to push. I guess that’s what happens when you’re there during a shift change. I decided to get into the Jacuzzi tub since that helped in the hotel. The next two hours were insane. Nothing provided relief. There was a repeat of the projectile vomit/diarrhea/contraction episodes and I remember Brian timing the contraction. After he got through two minutes I expected it to end, but another one even more intense followed. There was no relief and I was completely consumed. I vaguely wondered if I was in transition. I told Brian that I felt a lot of pressure and thought I needed to push. I doubted myself because I had only been there for about two hours.
All I remember from this part is writhing on the bed in pain. I felt so much pressure. The nurse finally came in to check me and said I was dilated to a 10, but my bag of water still hadn’t broken. I ended up having to wait another agonizing hour for the midwife and nurses to get there. This was by far the worst part; needing to push and not being able to. Brian tried to help me relax, but I just yelled, “I can’t!” as I gripped the bar on the side of the bed with both hands.
Finally the midwife arrived and broke my water. I didn’t feel anything except for a slight sense of relief and shock when she asked Brian if he could see the head and that it was “right there.” Brian later told me that he could see it about two inches in and that my body had basically been birthing the baby in the amniotic sack for the last 1 ½ hrs. Janet (the midwife) got everyone in position and told me to push with the next contraction. I saw lots of people coming in at this point setting up tables and putting on gloves. I thought that was a little premature since the birthing DVDs said we watched said to expect to push for 1-2 hrs for first babies.
My first push I had no idea what to do—but Janet explained exactly how to push and by the next contraction I figured it out. This is not to say that it was easy or felt good—I was wasted and my face and neck felt like a rock when I pushed. I grunted and yelled with every push; it was completely involuntary. It seemed like things were progressing fast because they kept saying I was doing great and the baby was almost out—but it took several more pushes before I felt the baby crowning. It definitely burned; especially since I birthed an inch of her head and then had to wait for the next contraction to finish it off. They asked me if I wanted to touch the head or get a mirror so I could see but at that point I didn’t care about anything other than getting her out and having it over so I shook my head. Finally her head was out and I remember thinking that everyone said her body was going to slide out but it didn’t. I think her torso is wide and I still had a few more pushes and could feel the midwife maneuvering her shoulders to get her all the way out and then feeling her slide out completely. 35 minutes of pushing and she arrived at 7:38am—four hours after checking into the hospital.
Relief was the first thing I felt. Then I looked down and watched her trying to scream (she had meconium mixed with the amniotic fluid they were suctioning her out with the bulb syringe) and her purple body unfolded for the first time. It was incredible. They put her immediately on me and I thought, “Wow, she looks so much like Brian!” I held her as she let out her first screams and she felt so warm and amazing and so ALIVE. I felt like all of my energy and strength had been transferred to this 8 pound 6 oz human being with wide eyes. As a matter of fact, I was so drained that when the nurse came to help me to the bathroom and hour later I completely passed out (Brian said I was completely gray and looked dead when he came in).
The moments that followed with her are hard to describe, but I felt an overwhelming love and appreciation for Brian, a reverence for womanhood, and a unity between the three of us that I can’t quite describe. We were a family and it felt tangible and real. I was also extremely hungry and wanted french toast.
So there it is. The birth of another human being and the team it took to get her here. I’m so glad that we were blessed to have a healthy pregnancy and baby and the opportunity to birth her naturally. . . and that the labor was only 17 hours.
