This is real (good).

First run postpartum to Morning Glory arch. 

Fisher Towers with the girls. 

The constant yin-yang of siblings. Liesel helping Hannah down from the rock and being oh-so-cute. 

This right here is why I buy clothes from Walmart. I've figured out a new technique. I can't get the kids to wear what I want them to while we are home. I'm tired of all of their regular stuff getting destroyed. So I let the wear whatever they want in the car and throw everything I want in a bag and change them at the trailhead. It sounds like more work, but believe me, it's less. 

I love the Chariot stroller. And I especially love this sleep inducing hammock that can hold even the tiniest little baby. 

Hannah looking like a giant next to Felicity. And to think I thought she was still a baby. . . ;)

She's been sleeping in the car a lot lately taking naps. We've converted to this more as summer approaches and days get longer. Naps again, and more staying up in the evenings. 

Changing diapers on the front seat and a pile of junk on the passenger seat. Pretty typical. 

Brian biked the White Rim in two days Fri-Sat- 80 miles of mountain biking in 24 hours. He got home yesterday afternoon to a house full of women and kids. 5 adult women and 9 kids. I cleaned up a little and made pizzas. That took most of the afternoon.

While he was gone I was having a crisis day on Friday. Feeling lonely and weird. I invited several friends to go hiking in Fisher Towers and luckily my friend Kerri could make it. She doesn't have kids, which is nice sometimes. I could have company on the somewhat long drive and we didn't just deal with or talk abut kids the entire time. 

We went to Lops afterward for ice cream, which didn't hold a candle to creamy McD's soft serve. 

When I got home, Heidi and Tami walked by. They were heading to the elementary school to play at the park. The kids and I had only eaten ice cream since lunch, but I felt like blowing off the routine and embracing the summertime carefree attitude a little. It was glorious. The kids played so well and I got to talk to other adults. Felicity slept on and off in the hammock in the stroller. The sun was setting as we walked back and there was a hint of the sweet Russian Olive smell in the air. The kids were absolutely filthy. Like, honestly black and brown all over between the hike earlier and playing on the rubber bits that fill the bottom of the playground. But they were so tired that I didn't bathe them until the following morning. 

Why am I writing about this? Something so mundane as walking to the park in the evening? Probably because I felt free and light. A feeling that is rare these days. It was one of the highlights of my week. 

Then I got home and frantically made eggs for dinner. The kids found the salt shaker when I was upstairs getting Felicity down and dumped it on their eggs. The eggs didn't get eaten, but at least they had toast. I finally got them down by 8:45 or 9pm. 

On my 2nd round of nursing Felicity at 4am, I was listening to it rain and thinking/worrying about Brian down on the White Rim. Liesel started to call my name and complained her ear was hurting. She ended up coming in my bed and fell asleep. Then snored. I never fell asleep again, because she woke up and started crying and then everyone woke up and was crying. It was ultra-rainy outside. 

Lindsey was camping with some friends. Texted her to come over and dry out and make breakfast. I put the kids in the tub to get clean (finally) and Lindsey and Co showed up at 6:30am. They stayed for about 15 mins and then went to Denny's. 

Picked up Bountiful Basket, watched Leslie's kiddos for a bit and then Heidi came over to play also. Then Kerri and Kelly showed up. 

And Brian came home to the house full of women and children and we are now full circle. 

Two days in my life. 

Where our weekends have been going. . .

Building the fence. Leveling dirt. Picking up rocks. Digging ditches for irrigation. Installing irrigation. Laying sod. 

That little rock wall you see there? Yeah, that was two weekends. We did it, and then moved it two feet forward, so it was all done again. There is a rock patio that you can't see. That took two weekends also. Finding the rocks, hauling them home little by little, laying them out and filling in between them. 

Brian working on his coop. I seriously think this is a work of art. So beautiful! The only thing I did was paint the trim pieces. 

 Now our 7 hens:

Melba

Gayle

Rosie

Tweetsie

Zinnia

Emmy

are living in style. We are planting grape vines on the west wall in the back so that they can have shade in the summer and sun in the winter. Our garden will be planted in that big dirt square next to the coop. 

And we need to plant trees! And our garden! 

Does it ever end? 

I never did post photos of the inside of the house. If I can ever get it clean all at once, and the vacuum actually put away, I'll do that too. 

First wedding of the spring/summer season tomorrow. I've officially met my goal of 12 weddings for the year. Feels both good and bad. Good-- to meet your goal and get the cash. Bad-- knowing the dark cloud of editing that will hang over my head every day until November. 

Felicity -- ONE month

 Felicity Anne is exactly one month today! April 19th. I went to church for the 1st time and Felicity slept through the whole thing with the exception of feeding once. I usually love church with a baby because it a great time to just sit and hold my babies-- not to mention is has always made the classes and sacrament so much more entertaining. But with Brian working every other Sunday and me on my own (like today), I ended up passing her to someone for 1/2 of sacrament and all of last hour of church. I had to teach Sunbeams and was worried about little kids poking and touching her. 

She has grown a lot in the past month. Probably not noticeably to anyone but Brian and I, but she is so much bigger! I love watching little baby thighs grow. They are the first things to chunk out and her s are so much bigger. She still sleeps so much during the day. I'm trying to remind myself to enjoy it, but I feel guilty that I don't get to interact more with her. She has an awake period in the morning (not a long one though) and I usually try to create one at 5:30 before bed. She has about a 50/50 success rate of going down easily at 6:30 or 7-- but she frequently is awake until 8 or 9pm fussing.  

She has a wicked case of baby acne on her chest. 

I used to think she looked a lot like Liesel and most people still do. But I don't think so anymore. I think she looks the most like my side of the family out of any of my other babies. Still too early to tell though. 

Can't tell much of her personality yet, but she screams like nobody's business when she is upset. Like I-think-she's-going-to-die-of-a-heart-attack screaming. Usually when she's in her carseat and I can't do anything about it. 

Transition to 3 kids hasn't been terrible yet. There are of course difficult times when everyone needs me at once and bedtime is much harder. . . but nothing I wasn't expecting, I guess. I'm sure as she gets older and less sleepy I'll be singing a different tune. Being out-numbered isn't shocking because it's usually me anyway with 2 kids, so three isn't that different. It's a bonus when I get Brian's help. He's very helpful, but also very busy. 

One thing is for certain, and that is that I love this little girl. As I was nursing tonight I was thinking about how new her little body is. I was wondering who her spirit is and was before she came to our family. I was thinking about how long she's waited to come to Earth. I thought about what she would do here and how I can help her prepare for her life's work. I thought about her sisters and my sisters and how I'm so glad they have each other. 

So thankful for this month we've had with you, Lissie. 

Grass is always greener

front of the house with the new sod! 

Backyard with sod & 1/2 finished chicken coop

Some of the helpers

This morning right after bfast for the girls and then bfast for Felicity, people started rolling in to help with sod. 1hr and 6 minutes later, it was in. I love looking out my window. I love driving up to the house. The whole feel is different. Of course it isn't without a few steps backward. Brian realized he didn't compact the dirt above the sprinklers enough and they are sinking in. He'll have to spend all day Monday lifting up the sod and packing the dirt better. Allison was here for the last three days, and that was great. She made sure all of the help got their doughnuts! And of course Liesel and Hannah too. I found them sampling several and pouring cup after cup of chocolate milk (I didn't know that Liesel could pour from a gallon jug so easily). Feel grateful for so much help! 

Met up with Heidi today. Went to Kashs bday party and then hiked up Negro Bill. It was nice to get back to our regular routine again. 

Hannah right after slipping. Lots of tears in this stage of life, but these kids are seriously excellent hikers. Hannah hiked two miles the other day and Liesel four miles. With minimal coaxing from either of them. They genuinely seemed to enjoy it. Hannah got super tired, but would not get into the backpack because Lindsey was carrying it and not mommy. Finally after a nursing break and sand castle building, she decided she was ready to ride in the pack and fell asleep after 5 mins. When she woke up she said, "Mommy I feel much bedder now after my good nap." Liesel can go for a while these days. She easily could have made it to the end of the 5 miles, but we had to turn around. She was very disappointed, so now I think I will take her with me next week and see if we can make it to the end. If she starts to get tired, I start a story and that will entertain her for forever. She loves stories. It takes some serious creativity and sometimes that's hard to come up with on the fly. I try to teach little lessons in them about not complaining, saying prayers, listening to parents etc. 

It seems like LIesel needs some extra love lately and she has been trying my patience constantly. It is shocking when she actually listens to something I say and does it. She is extremely emotional. Yesterday within 30 minutes she threw two giant fits-- crying, screaming etc. One because we weren't going to the end of the trail and she wanted to, the other because Rylee was a faster runner than her. I know I need to be kinder and more loving. That's my goal this week. 

Felicity is spitting up 1/2 of her feeding! So it seems. Projectile spit up and I've had to change my clothes a few times in the middle of the night. Other than that, she is thriving and doing well. I can't wait to see her smiles soon!! She still looks so much like Liesel did. 

In good company

Walked outside and found Liesel relaxing with her chick... Who appeared equally chill.this girl and her animals.

So we've had three weeks of company and it has been great and very needed. Lindsey arrived a few days before my parents left. I kept going from illness to illness, but on this day as my mastitis was clearing up and the cold/laryngitis hadn't begun, we snuck out for a quick hike up Negro Bill. It was lovely and the kids were champion hikers. Liesel wanted to keep going and Hannah hiked two miles on her own. She finally decided it was ok to get in the backpack and aunt Lindsey carried her the two miles back out... But she also lodged a cactus spine completely in her finger which Brian later had to dig out (after taking her blood pressure and pulse). It was kind of comical. Allison arrived Tues evening and was an amazing help through the week... She played with the kids, cooked and held the baby. We managed a one mile hike around the windows in arches. I am finally feeling better! Yay! And so ready to get back into the swing of these., already looking for new trails and running partners!

First time for everything

Liesel in the nesting boxes in the coop 

In bed on day two of mastitis. I wasn't in bed all day, but the fevers have started at 1pm both days and lasted through the night with the fever breaking around 3am. Mom and dad leave tomorrow and Felicity is still awake and fussing. 

The Saturday before Easter

All the kids at the Easter egg hunt this morning. It's been a tradition among our friends to meet up, bring our own eggs and let the kids loose. 

Liesel wanted her chicks to watch conference. I was a kill joy after I took this photo and made her put them back in the garage. Cleaning up chicken poop in the house? No thanks.

Hannah loves her baby... Most of the time. Unless mom is nursing and Hannah needs attention. Then Felicity gets a fingernail dug into her head. 

My parents have been such a giant help. I'm scared to have them gone. It kind of makes me amazed at my friends who get out with three kids all the time. I have tons of help. I have barely cooked. I've done no laundry. My kids are entertained. The baby is held when I need to help the other kids. I'm terrified for the end of company.

After conference, we dyed Easter eggs and the girls made giant messes. Liesel dyed her hands red and said "I'm so embarrassed in front of my friends!" It made me sad to think she even knows what that is. Wish I could preserve her innocence and confidence forever. 

Life.

Brian and my dad were busy working on the Taj Mahal oh chicken coops today. It is going to be pretty cool when it's all done. It has been so nice having my parents here. They watched the girls so Brianand I could sneak a date tonight. We went to a movie and grabbed a frozen yogurt, then went to the bridge over the Colorado. It was a full moon and slightly breezy. It really looked lovely. I felt very rich in that moment. I feel very lucky to have Brian in my life.

 I felt worried about Felicity. It's hard to leave a new baby. I see her little face when I close my eyes and she is just so helpless at this age. 

Vitamin Spring

Lots of good things lately. My dad arrived Tuesday. My girls are obsessed with grandpa. In fact, when my mom showed up last week the first thing Hannah said was, "where's grandpa?" He is so naturally curious and unhurried that children love him. Went on the river yesterday. Felicity was 12 days old and I am feeling guilty about the decision. Everything went fine, but I still feel funny about it. She is very chill. Almost oddly chill.